Baka and Test adventure!
by Numb3r Se7en
Summary: My sister and I travel to the land of Baka and Test!


**Rin (TheSponsor): James wanted to do this.**

**James: Hell yeah, I did!**

**Rin: I start writing first.**

The Portal of Epicocity:

Ba~ka!

"I have the strangest feeling I said we weren't going to use the portal anymore," I thought aloud as we stood in the bathroom.

"Why wouldn't we use it anymore?" James scoffed. "What is wrong with you? Good grief, woman!"

It had been quite some time since I had even taken any notice of the portal in the bathtub. It had gotten quite rusty since Dad continued to use the bath despite the obstruction.

"Where should we go?" I asked.

"Wherever we bloody well want to," James replied in what I assume was supposed to be a dramatic voice. "Hell, yeah!"

"But what-"

"Hell, yeah!"

"But what do-"

"Hell, yeah!"

I thought it best to wait a moment. James seemed to get bored quite quickly. "But where do we-"

"Hell, yeah!"

"WHERE DO WE WANT TO GO?"

James then went off on a tangent of which was indecipherable and ended with, "Lady-Land." I figured out what he meant due to our twinstincts. (Even though we're three years apart.) I slammed my fist on the big, red button. The portal of EPICOCITY! twirled noisily and sucked us into a world unprepared for fantastic creatures such as us.

It was a world of idiots.

According to cliché, James landed safely in Himeji's bosom. I grabbed him by the collar before he could even realise and yanked him to his feet. Himeji released a bashful, "Kyaa!"

All the (important) characters of F class were present—Yoshii, Yuuji, Hideyoshi, Mutsurini, Minami, and Himeji.

All of a sudden, various background characters in black cloaks abducted my little brother and tied him to a wooden stake and set it on fire. Since he's a demon, he didn't mind.

"Konnichiwa!" I greeted. "We're Australians who fell from your crappy ceiling!"

"Ah!" Yoshii nodded along. "Crappy ceiling Australians... I've heard stories of such things." Yuuji whacked him over the head.

Minami went into shock and started ranting something in German.

"What is with this boy?" the students cried. "He won't burn!"

"I'm cold..." James muttered.

**Change to James' POV**

"I miss Himeji's bosom..." I sighed.

"He won't burn!" an F student wailed.

"Take him down. It's not working," Sugawa said reluctantly.

"Who are you guys?" Hideyoshi asked.

"We told you," Rin reminded. "We're crappy ceiling Australians."

**Change to Rin's POV (because James is a lazy sod)**

James then did something I should have expected him to do from the beginning. He pulled out the puppy eyes. "Himeji nee-chan," he whined, "Minami nee-chan, the bullies scare me." I witnessed the melting of two, strong women. My heart aches for my kind.

"I'm still confused!" Yoshii shrieked.

"So am I," I confessed. "Something needs to be done." I had been thinking about it, but now I had decided. "James! We're enrolling here!"

"What?" James groaned. "I don't want to go to a real people school!"

"You're actually too young anyway," I pointed out. "Graduate from year 9 already."

"Bah! That's easy!"

"Yoshii!" I called. "James is staying at your place!"

"Oh, that makes sense- WHY IS HE STAYING AT MY PLACE?"

"Because you've got that awesome-ass sister," James shrugged as if it were obvious.

"WHAT DO YOU KNOW ABOUT MY SISTER?"

I invited myself to Hideyoshi's. Hideyoshi was too WEAK to stop me!

Over the weekend, James finished all of his work for the year, and we enrolled.

Monday came, and, low and behold, James and I both managed to get into class 2-F.

"What a clever boy," Minami commented, patting James on the head, "unlike someone I know."

"She means you," Yoshii said to Yuuji. Yuuji corrected him but didn't press the issue.

"It seems kind of weird for siblings three years apart to be put in the same class," Hideyoshi noted.

I proudly held my hand to my chest to give my explanation. "I tutored my dear brother," I said. "We thought it would be weird for him to go any higher than class F in second year, though. He would technically be a second or third year at junior high here. I, on the other hand..." I gave a peace sign and stuck my tongue out. "I flunked intentionally to be with James!"

"No ambition!" they all thought. "This girl has no ambition of her own!"

"I'll take a mock test to get my score up, though. You can count on me if there's a war." I thought for a moment. "So long as I don't have to physically do anything."

It turned out that our theory was correct. Not much learning actually occurred in F class. Lunch break came before I knew it, and that's when I lost James.

"I'll throw in this one," Mutsurini offered as he added a low-angle shot of Himeji to the pile.

"I'm not giving you a single yen," James beamed. "I have another offer." With a glint in his eye, he presented the ace up his sleeve. "I've been staying at Akihisa's house all weekend, and his sister is incredibly open."

Blood shot from Mutsurini's nose as soon as he caught sight of the photos. James shielded all of the pictures and waited for the older boy to compose himself.

"I... will not be... defeated so easily..."

James held eye-contact for a moment before holding up the pictures again. Mutsurini was rendered unconscious. James claimed his prizes and left without paying anything.

"A true pro..." Mutsurini muttered quietly.

I, meanwhile, must have said something stupid since I was suddenly in a mock war with Mikuru (I think)

**Change to James POV**

"You will never take away my true love!" Mikuru screamed.

"I'm not your true love!" Minami argued.

"I don't want her," Rin said.

"I don't believe you!"

"Should I take offence to that?" Minami thought to herself.

"Hey, Rin!" I greeted as I entered the room. "Lookie what I scor-"

I tripped and landed on Minami. Naturally my face fell on the obvious place. "Get off my honey!" A teacher walked past and Mikuru ran up to them. "Let us have a mock battle!"

The teacher didn't seem to care and nodded. "This is going to take effort isn't it?" I sighed.

"Why haven't you gotten off me yet?" Minami grumbled.

A barrier spawned around us and I reluctantly stood up. Rin and Minami left the battle square. "Summon!" Mikuru shouted.

I looked at the weird little Avatar. "What the heck is that?"

"James?" Yoshii asked. He saw me in an arena with Mikuru and jumped in. "Summon!" I glanced over at him.

"I'll take you both down!" Mikuru screamed.

I looked down at Yoshii's Avatar. "Summon!"

My Avatar had a black fedora and trench coat. It pulled out a cigar and lit it before putting it in his mouth. "His Avatar's a badass!" Yoshii and Minami thought.

"Shall we begin?" I asked, only half paying attention.

"Take him out!" Mikuru ordered.

Her Avatar ran at mine. "Deal with them," I sighed. I sat down and pulled out my 3DS. It pulled out a revolver and held it to Mikuru's Avatar's head. It pulled the trigger and wiped it out.

"No way!" Mikuru squealed.

Iron Man came out of nowhere and picked her up over his shoulder. "Any student who's score is reduced to zero gets remedial lessons!"

"Congratulations, James!" Yoshii grinned.

I turned to Yoshii. "You bug me."

Yoshii froze. "W-what?" My Avatar shot Yoshii's. Yoshii screamed and clutched his head. "YOU SHOT ME! YOU SHOT ME IN THE HEAD!"

"Rin, I'm bored."

"Me too, bro."

"Shall we leave?"

Iron Man ran back and dragged Yoshii into "Hell"

"Let's go."

**Rin: Okay... When we were deciding on our avatars, James said that mine would be in a dressing gown with a mug that said, "I hate everything." When I fought, I would glass people with said mug, though it probably wouldn't be made of glass... After he said this, he informed me that my Urahara plushie was dead and covered him with a tissue. By the way, why are you portrayed as a badass while I'm forced into the background?**

**James: Because I'm the writer now!**

**Rin: Let it be recorded that I had to correct James calling Iron Man the Tin Man.**

**James: It's his brother. Gosh! Don't you even watch the anime?**


End file.
